The end is in sight

I have just finished putting together my professional practice folders. I have worked really hard and tried to make sure everything is up together.

We had to give our presentations today and I completely did not realise I had to talk about my work The Wait. I was so disappointed as I had all the info in my sketch book and already recorded on my blog. Not sure how that I managed to miss this message from the tutor but will try and just get on with the rest of the course work and just hope that all the hard work will be ok in the end. At least I have learnt an awful lot this year and been able to really appreciate the whole experience.

Now I will return to textiles for the last 10 days before I start preparing for Art in Action.

Evaluating my Professional Practice Module

October 2012 was the starting point of the Professional Practice module which Bath Spa University have now run for  six years. We were put into 3 mixed media groups of about 12 students with the job of working together to put on an independent, local art exhibition. Throughout this journey, we would also receive careers advice to complement the whole experience with the aim of preparing us for The Art Business. 

Well, this definitely happened, so I will now try and sum up the key learning points including the struggles as well as the highlights. I will not go in to detail of the workings of an eclectic mix of students, what went wrong when we disagreed, how differences were sorted and how we coped with the the extra workload as people provided their reasons for not being able to get involved. It will suffice to say that we overcame most issues the best way possible by recording minutes of meetings and using Facebook frequently to try and keep everyone informed. Some jobs just could not be done to full capacity but we also knew that we just had to get on with it.  But we would have learn a lot  from  the experience and felt justly rewarded by the successful private view.

First, writing this blog - I knew I needed a web presence as an artist but had never got round to it. Quite often when I work at Art in Action (see link below)  people ask me about my art and what inspires me: now I have a great business card to hand out with my email  and blog address so that recent work and inspiration can be viewed.  I have handed out many cards  now and take my blog quite seriously; it is a great sounding board for ideas and has allowed me to tell my story whilst I reflect on the work made. My posts are fairly regular which is great as  frequency of new postings will help to raise my google profile: having my link on other websites and blogs will also be beneficial. I plan to start a Facebook business page, sign up to linkedIn and make more of Artolo and ensure my Flikr account is well organised. The next step is to think about keywords and meta tags which will help to raise my google profile  when I create a website this summer.

Next was the business of obtaining funding. We ran pop up cafes which proved challenging to start but eventually we worked as a team and made a small profit. I tried really hard to supplement this by trying to gain sponsorship from a local business. Lots of local companies were targeted each with a personally delivered letter and then phone calls; quite often a few calls as I was constantly redirected to different people who might be able to help. Eventually I gave up and think I just realised it was nothing more than a paper exercise: the only two rewards, a bottle of wine form a very good local wine company - Raisin Wine and a packet of coffee from The Boston Tea Party'.

With funding underway we had to think about marketing which simply means getting an audience. This is rather a large area but key facts learnt were to make sure that you get plenty of flyers out to the local audience because without this people wont come. We missed out on this: we planned a day as part of our marketing strategy but the flyers weren't quite ready and we didn't have enough time or available people to help to get out again and advertise our exhibition, 'Tell It Like It Is'. So whilst the gallery space at Walcot Chapel, and all of our worked looked great, our visitor numbers were quite poor compared to the other 2 groups of students. Big lesson learnt!

However, we did make use of free websites and were very successful at getting a press release into the Bath Chronicle (local newspaper). This was exciting as before the module I didn't even know such a way to advertise free was available. With some research, three of us worked out how to word the press release - tell the public why your event was unique, why were putting on the exhibition  rather than than just regurgitating art words to describe what people would be able to see.

The next big learning curve was curating: from deciding on a theme for the exhibition through to making decisions about how to create an interesting juxtaposition with the various work that for some students wasn't unveiled until the final 24 hours. Whilst we had had group crits and therefor knew what was going on for just over half of the group. I think that having a theme, although loosely interpreted in various mediums, really did help to focus the work because even those who didn't get involved had an idea of which direction to go with their work.

I chose photography as my choice of medium for the exhibition: this was easy to mount on MDF and looked very professional when hung. Eye level should have been 160 cms but we mistakenly set it at 170cm. However, everything else was also arranged at the same level so I think we managed to get away with it.

I am really interested in photography, capturing moments of curiosity, enjoyment and responses to the environment: this was my intention for professional practice. Being inspired by Jeff Wall and Roger Mayne, I went about taking photos of people where the characters are full sized, and the tensions between them and their backgrounds were evident. Their faces would tell the story, tell it like it is! I was really pleased with my print: the lady in the image was just standing amongst a crowd, she was not interested in the Jaz band which had caught everyone else’s attention, she was looking out for a friend, her boyfriend, who knows, but the picture told it like it was, the wait was consuming her attention and it did not matter about everthing else going on around her.

I do think that curating is very exciting but there does have to be a lot of planning and careful attention to detail. It was a crucially important exercise and has given me a great insight into this area of the art world: having to think about how your work will be displayed, how the audience will interact with it and does it meet the criteria for the show. But there is also the other side, artist who manage to reach the pinnacle of their career and have their own show.

During this process, I have become aware the huge amount of help that is available on line for starting up an art business. I have printed a lot of this and filed it in my folders ready for use as needed. As my memory is not the best I do like to see things in print in relevant sections of a folder, referring back to it as necessary. My folders are just a starting point but will help direct my employability quest once this module is over. 

But for my career to have a chance in this vast and complex market, I am aware of the need to make the most of any opportunities that arise. Nothing should be left to chance and records always kept of any projects or workshops I lead. But, most importantly I need to enjoy these experiences. My job as a midwife is about to restart again in August and whilst I am quite excited about this, it is very stressful. After the loss of my husband, my boys happiness is now of paramount importance and I can only help to secure this if I am enjoying my own life. If I continue to work hard with my degree, focus on  building a future career out of it, I will then be able to enjoy being a midwife because life is always easier if you have options. 

I have been very lucky to have the opportunity to teach felt making workshops  to year 1 and 2 textile students at Bath Spa Uni. I prepared a presentation of felt artists and techniques, organised a large collection of my samples and planned how I would structure the workshops. Both were successful and lots of felt samples have appeared in student crits. My next project is to make a wall hanging with the gifted and talented young artist at Bromley Heath Junior School, where my youngest son is in his last year. This is such wonderful chance to say thank you to the school whilst providing the young artists with an opportunity that will acknowledge their creative talents.  I then need to get down to planning my practical classes at Art in Action for this years event which starts on 18th July and runs for four days. I have entered the Best of the Best and my piece for this will be my next project when the uni work is handed in.

I think the final point is  to believe in my own ideas. The whole module has been based around how to work in the business of art, but without believing in your own work, this will not be possible. Realising I could be part of a group that was able to put on a very good show on a limited budget and with just a small team of students was very exciting: but the fact that I felt happy to hang my work, could talk well about it and be simultaneously considering the next photography project, was very rewarding. And whilst all this was happening I was about to have my first piece of work exhibited at the Royal West of England Academy, and  a second free machine embroidery drawing has been entered into the Jerwood Drawing Prize,  a fantastic way to end the module. 

http://www.artinaction.org.uk

See blog 21/03/2013 for exhibition images, but here are some more that help to tell the story...

Pop Up Cafe

Fundraising - Bag Packing at Sainsburys

Home made bread and fine cheese for private view

Ready for the Private View

Damage and Repair

As discussed on Friday 5th April, my exploration of the need for perfection in my life and the power of stitch in the quest to explore what happens when this does not happen had encouraged me to visit the Stitching and Thinking: Mending at the Museum,  at Bristol Museum and Art Gallery. The group 'Think and Stitch' evolved through the idea of listening, recording and reacting to makers as they reflected on their practice. This has sent me off on a slightly different tangent, perhaps a step backwards. My need to try and be perfect has come from the desperation to repair our lives after the loss of Carl and whilst we will never be able to cover over all the cracks, we could find good in new and unexpected ways. Remembering the Japanese art of 'Kintsugi' making beauty form broken pieces, I decided to look at the idea of damage and repair. 

Burnt hessian with machine embroidery repair.

Burnt scrim with machine embroidery repair.

Threads removed from hessian sacking and then repaired with machine embroidery.

As Dail Behennah (Stitching and Thinking, 2012) states "the darns in a much loved garment are usually stronger than the material they are mending. The jumper recedes, leaving the darns intact". In these images the darning is taken to a different level and becomes the focus of the cloth. A damaged piece has a new identity and whilst the weaknesses are evident, there being has led to new beauty. The next step is too push this further on larger lengths of fabric. 

Also, I am thinking about entering 'It's Only Bricks and Mortar' into the Jerwood Drawing competition.  My plan to do this is supported by Partington's comments on  Janet Haigh's practice (Stitching and Thinking, 2012) :

   

     "...her work is often successfully developed by reflecting on making that has gone awry and this occurrence is recognised and acknowledged by other makers. It is the reflection of this and the ability to let the work lead, rather than impose upon it, that offers a way forward." 

Awaiting the frame from Meltone Gallery, will then do my online entry. 

http://jerwoodvisualarts.org/3088/Jerwood-Drawing-Prize-2013/13 

Only 4 weeks to go now!

I had quite a long crit at uni this morning: there was lots to discuss and now I need to decide what to push further and what to leave for now. It is proving quite hard to keep up the momentum but I know it will be worth it.

During the crit we discussed my theme of perfection/ imperfection and linked it back well to the writings of Henry Moore that started this project "...all life is a conflict; that's something to be accepted, something you have to know. And you have to die, too, which is the opposite of living. One must try to find a synthesis, to come  to terms with opposite qualities. Art and life are made up of conflicts"(Wilkinson, 2002) he goes on to say that in great art this conflict is hidden and unsolved, it is not perfect.  I think this is happening in my work but as it becomes more apparent, I am actually finding it a little uncomfortable. However, this realisation is strengthening my confidence and ambition and allowing me to be more creative. In this latest piece, 'It's Only Bricks and Mortar', I felt really happy with my ability to draw and then strongly questioned these  feelings when the process of removing the backing fabric sent the work off in a different direction. The imperfections at first seemed to overwhelm the work, but then I  remembered what I was trying to explore, the need for perfectionism and the underlying conflicts that might prevent this from happening and actually make make the work more alive and interesting. The imperfect work,  'It's Only Bricks and Mortar'  throws up many more questions than the perfect image did. Also, the work is becoming two parts, the embroidery held together on the strengthening backing fabric, and then the vulnerable thread drawing without its support structure. Like the artists featured in my earlier blogs, Naseem Darbey and Amanda McCavour, the direct observation drawings made from the many  stitches are strong but the individual threads can show their vulnerability. This is key to the work:  how I explore and feel about the imperfections, how it benefits the finished piece or how it might constrain it. The intact, perfect stage of 'It's Only Bricks and Mortar' helped me to believe that I can draw, but the acceptance of the imperfections in the second stage is supported by Klee's (Hughes, 1991) suggestion that we make our most creative work as children, when we  let go of our inhibitions and allow the innocence to shine through. Vulnerability is not a weakness, it is what and how we perceive it. Whilst trying to be perfect and keep everything going at home (after the loss of Carl) may seem like the only solution, actually being able to accept that this isn't always necessary can produce the best sense of satisfaction.

So I have taken 'It's Only Bricks and Mortar' to Meltone Gallery to have a framed made. I will continue to work on making images that are allowed to have imperfections in their execution, continuing with the same theme ie drawings of new skills learnt since being widowed; which has incidentally thrown the idea of masculine and feminine ideologies into the mix. I will also remember the idea of taking apart my 'perfect moment',  photographic images as inspired by Anna Glasbrook's work. Here the possibilities of using some silk painted fabrics with stitch on dissolvable fabrics, allowing both sides to be visible will be played with, but perhaps after this academic year. 

References

Hughes, R. (1991) The Shock of the New. Art and the Century of Change. London: Thames and Hudson.

Wilkinson, A.G (2002) Henry Moore: Writings and Conversations by Henry Moore: (Online) Available from: http://books.google.co.uk/books?id=pzqg4l-ce7oC&printsec=frontcover&source=gbs_ge_summary_r&cad=0#v=onepage&q&f=fals

Update on drawing of the drill

I removed the backing from the drill today but just not sure what I think of it.

Free machine embroidered drill

Well, I just can not decide. I like the more natural form and again I enjoyed watching it change shape as the backing fabric washed away. It may be because I was so pleased the original drawing and I feel that  the imperfections have rather taken over as apposed to complimenting the work. But I have learnt alot about this process which is really good.

First, too many stitches in the design, ie any attempt to correct mistakes which results in a build up of layers will add a lot of fulness to the drawing when the backing fabric is removed. Second, on washing away the backing fabric, try not to remove too much of the glue as this provides a good stiffening agent. Third, I need to make plenty of samples: taking notes of how the images are constructed, ie type of threads, layers or thickness of  stitches, and tensions used. I also need to try different types of dissolvable fabrics. Also like to try some painted fabrics with the embroidery. This is just the beginning. 

Free Machine Embroidered Drill

I have just finished another piece of embroidery within the theme of things I have learnt/ had to do since being widowed. Carl was so good at DIY but really had little interest in doing it as a hobby, it was simply a means to an end and he often quoted "there is more to life than bricks and mortar". So maybe that will be the title, not sure!

Now I need to remove the backing fabric and see just what happens: will I get the same result as I did with the camera? Will the imperfections in my work, the weaknesses in the thread, demonstrate a new identity and inner strength just as I am trying to do in my life. But also, there is an added twist, a mans tool represented through the feminine art of stitch. So whilst I am reminded of the sense of loss, the  dislocation is providing new questions and ideas. 

Where next, perhaps more tools, more symbols of empowerment through the exploration of the necessity to be perfect? Plan to research Alice Kettle:

Alice Kettle

Creation 1990-1, MIAAO, Turin, Italy

Coeus Dream, 2006

Alice Kettle first studied fine art at Reading but then concentrated on textiles at Goldsmiths as she more comfortable, instantly recognising an affinity with the practice. Kettle felt better able to draw with stitch than she could with paint or drawing. Stitch felt more liberating as she was not constrained by shape, scale or surface: it was intuitive and immediate. As I have also found during my work - Kettle describes lots of elements that can be played with. Direction can be changed, the tension and speed altered, and the relationship between the top and bottom threads swapped to change the shades and tones of  the thread. And whilst I do this, my inhibitions are lifted as I think more about these processes and less about trying to make a perfect piece of art, although I do hope that I will still be very pleased with the end result.

website: www.alicekettle.com

Some new samples...

I have just uploaded some images of some new samples for my textile project so that I can make some comments and try to decide just where to go from here.

This first image continues to explore the idea of drawing tools which represent the news skills I have learnt since loosing Carl. Whilst this could be seen as a negative subject, to me it suggests a positive aspect of the new way that we are having live our lives. Rather than giving up, I have embraced the opportunity of learning these skills and enjoyed the new sense of independence, although sometimes it does just feel like a case of stoicism. The performance of these male dominated skills is then being represented in a very female form, embroidery. The felt base has a wonderful soft feel like a blanket, like a skin and therefor can offer comfort and protection. Each stitch makes me carefully study the drill, thinking about the jobs Carl used it for but also reminding me of my small moments of success. No preliminary marks are made and no mistakes are corrected in the aim of trying to remove the notion that it has to be perfect. The imperfections will form part of the memory: they will remind me of how many holes I made in the kitchen wall when trying to put up the window blind with my sister. Imperfections are part of our life, what matters is how we embrace them!

I will try some other methods of drawing on the felt such as using ink, oil pastel and needle felting  (see previous blog dated 3rd March). Will continue with same theme ie the camera,  drill, saw, central heating box, oil and air in car etc. Just need to decide if will continue using felt or go back to what I love most, free machine embroidery on dissolvable fabric because I think this medium best explores the ideas of perfection and vulnerability.

Free Machine Embroidery, Drill on Felt

The next three images are some experiments made in the exploration of perfection and vulnerability. The works were formed as a response to an image of rocks on a beach, but also an exploration of different approaches to free machine embroidery.

Free machine embroidery on handmade paper.

Free machine embroidery on net and dissolvable fabric

Holes made in muslin, pulled tight over embroidery frame and holes reinforced.

I found these techniques very enjoyable as there wasn't a lot of control over the finished effect and therefor they feel they are more useful in my exploration of the need for perfection. Whilst the drawn image on felt isn't removed from the foot of the sewing machine to look for errors and therefor not corrected during the making process, it does have a dependable, substantial feel and thus the imperfections in the drawing look just like mistakes. I feel that this  hinders the appearance of the work and does not provide a new dimension as was achieved with the camera drawing on dissolvable fabric. So next: first continue on felt with different mediums in which to make marks to see if similar results occur and second, try images of drill etc on dissolvable fabric. Consider using some samples of coloured fabric.