What to call my work

I can not think  how to title my drawing of Carl's drill. It's Only Bricks and Mortar has been the title , but that would be about Carl,  this is now about the boys and myself: how we have managed without him. I am wondering if Having to Use His Drill is more appropriate, not sure so will give it some thought. The correct title is very important if I want people to engage and wonder what the piece is about. It must not be obvious but suggestive of the struggle I have had trying to be perfect but also how empowering it is to manage, to cope and actually appreciate what we do have.

Having to Use His Drill ??

This might work. But  I think I will just give myself a little more time. The Jerwood Drawing Prize will let me change the title if that is what I decide to do. 

Finished pieces and the end of this academic year

I have finished the last of my machine embroidered tools as part of my series of works based on skills that I have learnt since being widowed. As of yet they are untitled as I need to give this some thought. I am very pleased with the result but there is that tinge of sadness - I have made them in a response to loosing Carl: but that will always be the way my work evolves. However, it is a positive response: we still refer to them as dad's tools so his memory will never fade.

Free Machine Embroidered Screw Drivers

Free Machine Embroidered Hammer

And the result, the answer to my quest to explore the need to be perfect - a very interesting point. Referring back to the start and Henry Moore's quote "... all life is a conflict; that's something to be accepted, something you have to know...One must try to find a synthesis, to come to terms with opposite qualities. Art and life are made up of conflicts." For this reason Moore believes that in great art this conflict is hidden and therefore it is not perfect. 

The conflict in my work is the need to get everything right, to be perfect otherwise I have failed, but with this technique,  I cannot be perfect, there will be a certain amount of shape change and any weaknesses in the stitching will show. Like Amanda McCavour, I repeatedly and compulsively stitched  the designs and I have turned Carl's ordinary hammer, drill, screwdriver and camera into something that is extraordinary. The fragility shows: the thread is dense yet there are loose areas which suggest vulnerability, suggest a new meaning- that these imperfections might make the work successful. 

And for me, I have not left the need to be perfect as this is something that can not be resolved over night. It's Only Bricks and Mortar really pushed this to the limit. I worked so hard on the drawing but when I washed the backing away I was really upset with the result. It had completely distorted, but then I was able to question why I felt like this. I had spent a lot of time carefully embroidering the drill and then within 2 minutes, it had changed, changed in way that I had not expected. But then I realised that I was really on to something. The conflict of needing to be able to draw well, needing to be able live my life well, could stop me from being creative but if I just let go I would be able to realise the beauty in life's imperfections. As Janet Hague from Thinking and Stitching suggests, it is this reflection on the things that have gone wrong that can let the work lead, rather than inhibit and offer a way forward.


So where shall I go from here?  This academic year has been so exciting: I have looked at the work of Anna Glasbrook, which I want to continue exploring whilst I decide how to push further
my painted fabrics and stitch, using photographic images as my source, and move beyond the white canvas and frame as used in 'Together'. Heather Belcher has encouraged me to try mark making on felt and allowed me to make still life images of  possessions that remind us of the fragility of the human figure along with the feelings of loss and dislocation. Naseem Darby and Amanda McCavour have inspired my machine embroidery, but still I want to try sculpting, maybe over more personal possessions, maybe on a larger scale, suspended or in glass. And then there is the idea of Damage and Repair as inspired by Dail Behennaih and Jessica Turrell from the Bristol Museum - Stitching and Thinking. This has been a lot of fun and still has a long way to go such as working with rusty metal and embroidery, more damaged or old fabrics. Perhaps I could work from the shape, pattern or remnants of the damage.

Other artists to explore - Alice Kettle
Other materials - leather, metal

Feeling tired

I can't believe this is the final week to finish off. Professional practice folders went in this morning, have tried so hard and have learnt a lot so I guess that is what really matters. It has been a very time consuming module but well worth doing. My folders were very full but will now be a useful resource for the future: curating, marketing, strengthening my web presence and direction for growth of an art career.

Anyway, now time to enjoy making my final pieces for textiles. Have attached some images of the second piece I am working on for my free machine embroidered series on 'things I have learnt to do since Carl died'.

have now finished it ....

Going to remove the backing in the morning so that  I can use the daylight to help keep a careful watch on how much fabric I remove. I really want to try and keep a lot of glue in it otherwise it may be difficult to suspend in the frame.

A comment on 'Artist Statements' and beyond

One final point as my professional practice module comes to an end - artist statements: I have just struggled to decide on which one should be included with this portfolio. Having never used an artist statement before this module, it did at first seem quite easy to write one (As seen on this blog) because my work is so driven by personal issues, but now I am beginning to wonder if there might be two different angles to my work. Whilst I am completely wrapped up in the need to use art to explore psychological states of being, I think this is also encouraging my need to capture other people and just wonder what is going on in their lives. So am I interested in Street Photography simply because I am curious, curious about their lives, their movements and their moments of chaos or calm because it provides another angle to help me answer questions about my own life? I don't know, but I do think it is very interesting. And next year, will I keep this single artist profile or will there be a division: perhaps  my textile work is proving successful as it responds well to the exploration of personal issues, but perhaps I can just enjoy street photography out of a sense of curiosity: curiosity about the world in which we all  live, but also a need to sometimes let go and just have fun.

Anyway, thought I would  finish by posting some more of my photographic images taken for this project which at the moment are just stored in my sketchbook. And then I can decide the way forward for next year.

Man on the harbour side, 2012

Husband and Wife on the Tube, 2012

A Lady with her Trolley, 2013

At Play, 2013

 Untitled, 2013

Plan: look at Sophie Calle's work called The Bronx, 1999. In this work, Calle asked some homeless people to take her to their favourite place in the Bronx. She asked them why it was their favourite and photographed the individual so as to emphasise the reality of this environment. This has inspired me to consider a similar project on the cycle path in Bristol. Often I can feel a little inhibited by the people who use this track whilst I also wonder who they are and where they are going. But if I was to try and find out a little more about these people,  capturing these questions on camera and maybe by forming a narrative, I could also give a touch of gentleness to what seems like a tough area.

Funding for the Arts

Here is a list of sources for funding for art:

Art business. Com

www.artbusiness.com/osorgrants.html

Grant Space

Grantspace.org/Tools/Knowledge-Base/Individual-Grantseekers/Artist/Fund

Arts In Health

www.artshealthand wellbeing.org.uk/resources/funding-sources

Arts for Health

www.artsforhealth.org

Res Artis

www.resartis.org/en/

Artquest

Artists’ Resindencies

www.artquest.org.uk/articles/view/artists-residencies

and funding

www.artquest.org.uk/articles/view/funding51

UCA

Art. Jobs and residencies

Community.ucreative.ac.uk/article/21940/Arts-Jobs-and-Residencies

Art Web

The Artist Newsletter

www.artweb.com/artists-newsletter

University of the Arts London

Blogs.arts.ac.uk/libraryservices/2013/04/23/artstor-suscription

Art Monthly

Magazine, Events, Galleries

www.artmonthly.co.uk/magazine/site/newsletter

Artist Network

www.artistnetwork.com/get-the-free-artists-networks-newsletter

The National Lottery

www.lotterygoodcauses.org.uk/funding

The Princes Foundation for Children and the Arts

www.childrenandarts.org.uk/

Make Space

www.makespace.org.uk/resources/funding-opportunites/grant-making-bodies-and-charitable-trusts

Bristol City Council

Arts and Culture Funding

www.bristol.gov.uk/page/leisure-and-culture/arts-and-culture-funding

A big thank you to Judith Perry, Textile Artist

Finally framed at last

I have just managed to get It's Only Bricks and Mortar framed. Took three hours to sort out but pleased with results. Now plan to make hammer and screwdriver as think a series would be really good.

It's Only Bricks and Mortar

Also want to continue working on my idea of damage and repair. I did spot this work in May/june issue of Embroidery by Lizz Aston

Lizz Aston, Antiquated Notions

This is paper, free machine embroidery and burn outs. After my crit at uni today I am going to experiment with some more random, lack of control scorched damage to scrim or hessian: not decided how yet. Here is a link to detailed profile of her work.

http://www.worldofthreadsfestival.com/artist_interviews/041_lizz_aston_11.html

The end is in sight

I have just finished putting together my professional practice folders. I have worked really hard and tried to make sure everything is up together.

We had to give our presentations today and I completely did not realise I had to talk about my work The Wait. I was so disappointed as I had all the info in my sketch book and already recorded on my blog. Not sure how that I managed to miss this message from the tutor but will try and just get on with the rest of the course work and just hope that all the hard work will be ok in the end. At least I have learnt an awful lot this year and been able to really appreciate the whole experience.

Now I will return to textiles for the last 10 days before I start preparing for Art in Action.

Evaluating my Professional Practice Module

October 2012 was the starting point of the Professional Practice module which Bath Spa University have now run for  six years. We were put into 3 mixed media groups of about 12 students with the job of working together to put on an independent, local art exhibition. Throughout this journey, we would also receive careers advice to complement the whole experience with the aim of preparing us for The Art Business. 

Well, this definitely happened, so I will now try and sum up the key learning points including the struggles as well as the highlights. I will not go in to detail of the workings of an eclectic mix of students, what went wrong when we disagreed, how differences were sorted and how we coped with the the extra workload as people provided their reasons for not being able to get involved. It will suffice to say that we overcame most issues the best way possible by recording minutes of meetings and using Facebook frequently to try and keep everyone informed. Some jobs just could not be done to full capacity but we also knew that we just had to get on with it.  But we would have learn a lot  from  the experience and felt justly rewarded by the successful private view.

First, writing this blog - I knew I needed a web presence as an artist but had never got round to it. Quite often when I work at Art in Action (see link below)  people ask me about my art and what inspires me: now I have a great business card to hand out with my email  and blog address so that recent work and inspiration can be viewed.  I have handed out many cards  now and take my blog quite seriously; it is a great sounding board for ideas and has allowed me to tell my story whilst I reflect on the work made. My posts are fairly regular which is great as  frequency of new postings will help to raise my google profile: having my link on other websites and blogs will also be beneficial. I plan to start a Facebook business page, sign up to linkedIn and make more of Artolo and ensure my Flikr account is well organised. The next step is to think about keywords and meta tags which will help to raise my google profile  when I create a website this summer.

Next was the business of obtaining funding. We ran pop up cafes which proved challenging to start but eventually we worked as a team and made a small profit. I tried really hard to supplement this by trying to gain sponsorship from a local business. Lots of local companies were targeted each with a personally delivered letter and then phone calls; quite often a few calls as I was constantly redirected to different people who might be able to help. Eventually I gave up and think I just realised it was nothing more than a paper exercise: the only two rewards, a bottle of wine form a very good local wine company - Raisin Wine and a packet of coffee from The Boston Tea Party'.

With funding underway we had to think about marketing which simply means getting an audience. This is rather a large area but key facts learnt were to make sure that you get plenty of flyers out to the local audience because without this people wont come. We missed out on this: we planned a day as part of our marketing strategy but the flyers weren't quite ready and we didn't have enough time or available people to help to get out again and advertise our exhibition, 'Tell It Like It Is'. So whilst the gallery space at Walcot Chapel, and all of our worked looked great, our visitor numbers were quite poor compared to the other 2 groups of students. Big lesson learnt!

However, we did make use of free websites and were very successful at getting a press release into the Bath Chronicle (local newspaper). This was exciting as before the module I didn't even know such a way to advertise free was available. With some research, three of us worked out how to word the press release - tell the public why your event was unique, why were putting on the exhibition  rather than than just regurgitating art words to describe what people would be able to see.

The next big learning curve was curating: from deciding on a theme for the exhibition through to making decisions about how to create an interesting juxtaposition with the various work that for some students wasn't unveiled until the final 24 hours. Whilst we had had group crits and therefor knew what was going on for just over half of the group. I think that having a theme, although loosely interpreted in various mediums, really did help to focus the work because even those who didn't get involved had an idea of which direction to go with their work.

I chose photography as my choice of medium for the exhibition: this was easy to mount on MDF and looked very professional when hung. Eye level should have been 160 cms but we mistakenly set it at 170cm. However, everything else was also arranged at the same level so I think we managed to get away with it.

I am really interested in photography, capturing moments of curiosity, enjoyment and responses to the environment: this was my intention for professional practice. Being inspired by Jeff Wall and Roger Mayne, I went about taking photos of people where the characters are full sized, and the tensions between them and their backgrounds were evident. Their faces would tell the story, tell it like it is! I was really pleased with my print: the lady in the image was just standing amongst a crowd, she was not interested in the Jaz band which had caught everyone else’s attention, she was looking out for a friend, her boyfriend, who knows, but the picture told it like it was, the wait was consuming her attention and it did not matter about everthing else going on around her.

I do think that curating is very exciting but there does have to be a lot of planning and careful attention to detail. It was a crucially important exercise and has given me a great insight into this area of the art world: having to think about how your work will be displayed, how the audience will interact with it and does it meet the criteria for the show. But there is also the other side, artist who manage to reach the pinnacle of their career and have their own show.

During this process, I have become aware the huge amount of help that is available on line for starting up an art business. I have printed a lot of this and filed it in my folders ready for use as needed. As my memory is not the best I do like to see things in print in relevant sections of a folder, referring back to it as necessary. My folders are just a starting point but will help direct my employability quest once this module is over. 

But for my career to have a chance in this vast and complex market, I am aware of the need to make the most of any opportunities that arise. Nothing should be left to chance and records always kept of any projects or workshops I lead. But, most importantly I need to enjoy these experiences. My job as a midwife is about to restart again in August and whilst I am quite excited about this, it is very stressful. After the loss of my husband, my boys happiness is now of paramount importance and I can only help to secure this if I am enjoying my own life. If I continue to work hard with my degree, focus on  building a future career out of it, I will then be able to enjoy being a midwife because life is always easier if you have options. 

I have been very lucky to have the opportunity to teach felt making workshops  to year 1 and 2 textile students at Bath Spa Uni. I prepared a presentation of felt artists and techniques, organised a large collection of my samples and planned how I would structure the workshops. Both were successful and lots of felt samples have appeared in student crits. My next project is to make a wall hanging with the gifted and talented young artist at Bromley Heath Junior School, where my youngest son is in his last year. This is such wonderful chance to say thank you to the school whilst providing the young artists with an opportunity that will acknowledge their creative talents.  I then need to get down to planning my practical classes at Art in Action for this years event which starts on 18th July and runs for four days. I have entered the Best of the Best and my piece for this will be my next project when the uni work is handed in.

I think the final point is  to believe in my own ideas. The whole module has been based around how to work in the business of art, but without believing in your own work, this will not be possible. Realising I could be part of a group that was able to put on a very good show on a limited budget and with just a small team of students was very exciting: but the fact that I felt happy to hang my work, could talk well about it and be simultaneously considering the next photography project, was very rewarding. And whilst all this was happening I was about to have my first piece of work exhibited at the Royal West of England Academy, and  a second free machine embroidery drawing has been entered into the Jerwood Drawing Prize,  a fantastic way to end the module. 

http://www.artinaction.org.uk

See blog 21/03/2013 for exhibition images, but here are some more that help to tell the story...

Pop Up Cafe

Fundraising - Bag Packing at Sainsburys

Home made bread and fine cheese for private view

Ready for the Private View